Charlie, I know you love venison and wanted to let you know that Grandma Plaintiff went out of her way to get you some fresh venison for Christmas. On her way home from work, she saw five deer crossing the…
Rocking chair rants
The old man sits on the rocking chair and rants
So you can talk – big deal…
Dear Rude little girl … I want to start this off by telling you that I had recently told Nana that I’d most likely buy you your first car. Because I love you that much. Anything that you could possibly…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
I think your mommy cheated…
Dear Charlie… I’m not sure how to break this to you, so I’m just going to blurt it out.. I think you’re Mommy cheated on your Daddy. I don’t think your Daddy is your Daddy. I think by the end…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
Pool Parties lead to heartaches….
Dearest Darling Charlie, I had the distinct pleasure of video chatting with you while you were out back playing in the pool in your cute little beach outfit this past weekend. While I really enjoyed our talk, I was alarmed…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants
The universe spins around me
I think I grew up on a different planet. I’m not sure how I made it here to the planet Earth, but here I am. I look back at my youth and realize that I must of been transported here…
Rocking chair rants
Grandpa is grounded?!?!?!?
I frequently chuckle as I think back on the stupid stunts my children pulled and how I grounded them from things they liked as a form of punishment. I recall taking away the phone, TV, electronics, the car and ultimately…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
Is Plaintiff Insane?
I’m not sure what the actual definition of “Certifiably Insane” is, but I think that Plaintiff is either really close or has already gone over the edge. I got a text message from her recently telling me to check my…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
Reflections…
Hello Charlie… I met you for the first time today. I took you into my arms from your Mom and instantly flashed back to what seems like only yesterday when a nurse handed me your Mom for the first time…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
Come out come out wherever you are…
Dear Charlie, I understand that your Mother has had enough of you being inside of her and has had the Doctor issue you an ultimatum. Surrender and come out on your own no later than 7 am Wednesday March 12,…
Her Royal Highness, Rocking chair rants, We put the FUN in dysfunctional
Diets?
Plaintiff has decided that she’s going to go on the South Beach diet. Of course, by “she” – she actually means her and I both. Not sure how we got to this point in our relationship, but as I cannot…